Summer Thoughts

Summer is weird.

More than anything I feel like I'm drifting, watching sun and clouds and thunderstorms pass by my bedroom window and forgetting the days are moving by with them.

It's been longer than normal this year, dragging its feet and muttering noncommittally when asked where we are going and when we will get there. I blink and it's 11 pm again. I can never decide if I should sleep or continue whatever nothing I was doing until I decide it's too late to be awake.

But overall, I've been alright. It's been good. No, I will not be taking any averages, because if I am wrong, I would rather live in ignorance and believe my summer was better than it really was.

What do I have to show for it?

- 10,000 words of a new project.
- Some badly made doll clothes.
- Aesthetic Pinterest boards.
- A newly wedded Sim family who are winning at life.
- Legs full of mosquito bites.

- Late-night creativity.

- A small scribble of black pen in my journal labelled "me."

- Something of a tan, faded from a painful sunburn.

- A 4 on the AP U.S. History exam.

- Three books marked "read" on Goodreads.

- Pictures of boats.

- Song lyrics written in magnets on my whiteboard.

- A single, green, fingerless glove.

- 34 consecutive journal entries, plus others after I skipped a day.

- Another American Girl doll (her name is Stormé).

- A drawing of a stick person falling off of a boat, also labelled "me."

- Two happy playlists.

- A short story.

- Sticky note lists with check marks and doodles on them.

- An organized bookshelf.

That's more than a few things, when you put them all together.

I would be going back to school this week, but my district pushed it back. I'll be back in two weeks instead. I'll probably snap out of this late-summer daze the night before while I remember how to wake up at 6 a.m. and wash my face.

I'm not sure if I'm ready exactly, but am I ever? Or maybe I am, and it's just senior year nerves getting the best of me. I don't miss the academics so much as the socializing and stability, and at this point, I don't know what to expect in either department. 

But we will find out!

I'll leave you with a song. Not the Same by Malinda started playing as I finished adding photos, and it's fitting, besides being one of my favorite songs.

How has your summer gone?